The 4 Simons and me

 This season, I see myself having the mind of the three Simons! And a desire to have the mind of the 4th Simon….

Simon the Leper

One who had experienced Jesus’ healing touch but that does not seem to have changed his perspectives of looking at others.

Experienced Christ, but looking at issues from logic, legalistic judgmental and rational perspective, economy and cost effectiveness, looking at issues from intellectual spirituality, armchair planning for caring for poor etc. Not able to see from a heart and spirit perspective, the heart and spirit of Mary. Mary who was moved in her heart, and spirt by a sense of gratitude, overwhelming gratefulness to Jesus for what He had done…. You can experience Christ and what Christ does for you, but you cannot take the Pharisee out of you….

The logical, legalistic and judgmental mind….

I have the mind of Simon – when I see others and their responses, when I see the contexts around me – I see it through my intellect, logic and legalistic perspective. I am unable to see through the eyes of Christ!

Simon the Disciple

One who as the last few days of Jesus life approached, was going through a bipolar response. Recognizing Jesus as Messiah then telling him not to go to cross – thinking thoughts of God one time and thinking things from the evil one the next minute. Refusing feet to be washed, next moment asking to be bathed. Promising to hold on to Jesus rejecting him soon. Repenting and returning, deciding to give up on following Jesus and going back to fishing the next day!

I have the mind of Peter the Disciple – the bipolar mind! One day when I hear a message about hope I am upbeat, then I read the news paper of listen to a TV show, I am down beat!

The unstable and divided mind….

Simon the Cyrene

One who was forced to carry the cross against his will! Wondering a t times, why did I have to carry someone else’s cross at times. Problems and confusions created by others, need to be sorted out. I wonder why people cannot carry their own crosses! Why are leaders in position – creating problems that others must face and sort out….

The complaining mind….

But I want to be like Simon the Zealot. One who did not say much but allowed his perspectives to be changed over time. So much that He became a martyr, in Europe for the gospel and Kingdom he was invited to be part of.

This is in his own words…

I had already heard about him. In our meetings of the Zealots there was a difference of opinion about him. We had been waiting for a Messiah who will restore the nation back to us. Who will overthrow the Roman occupation and give back freedom to us? We will join him as his army and fight against the Romans, free the temple, our land and establish the National and religious systems. We will be free to be Jews in a Jewish nation again!

And this is when we heard that this new Rabbi in town has been talking “The Kingdom of Heaven/God is near”. Was he the person who will bring this to pass, if so, we need to join him? From what he was talking regarding the kingdom it looks is as if he is talking about something that will change soon! But somehow what he was doing did not seem in line with what we thought he should be doing if the kingdom had to be restored!

So, majority felt that he is not the person whom we should follow. But I felt he should be given the benefit of doubt. We have been waiting, fighting and planning. Even if he is not the right one, there is nothing wrong in trying him out since he is the first one in the last many years to openly talk about the kingdom. We need such a leader, who is unafraid to talk about restoring the nation and kingdom!

And that is when he met me (I was wanting to meet him) and invited me to follow him. Unusual way – Rabbis do not invite disciples; disciples request the Rabbis! He seems to be doing things differently – there is something that is attracting me to him, but I was not sure if it was worth following him.

But over the next 3 and half years, life changed, I started understanding the Kingdom in a different way. I had to unlearn much as I walked with him, listened to what he taught us, saw His life and lived life together.

I thought about a powerful army led by Him and us as his generals, but he talked about kingdom like a mustard seed, with its small beginnings of a potential larger influence. He talked about the Kingdom being like the yeast - the invisible but an invincible presence! Completely different from the powerful army that I was dreaming!

He talked about the Kingdom like scattered seeds, some eaten by birds, some scorched by sun, some choked, but some – a minority that grows well. Again, challenging my dreams of the whole nation of Israel coming around him and joining him in the new Kingdom.

He talked about 2 kingdoms existing together - The weed and the wheat - allowed to grow together, till a future day, and the Net - the future when the good and bad be separated but today all swim together. But we were dreaming of the Romans being defeated and we freed from the occupation!

He talked about all in the kingdom being equal through a story of the workers in vineyard- the nonhierarchical community of equals with equal rewards where I was dreaming about me being part of the ruling team in the new Kingdom!

I was challenged by the stories of the two sons and Wedding Banquet that those in the Kingdom might not those are vociferous (like me) and the invited but those who live out what they talk and the uninvited.

And I started understanding that the Kingdom was not a physical one, but a spiritual one, one that will emerge in the margins, through a minority, and not from the corridors of power. But I also started realizing that there will be a day, those who were ruling over us, and having rights today, will face the wrath of the King and lose their rights – may be after my time in the world is over! But still a hope worth living for.

And in the interim I must persevere, keep my light burning like the wise virgins, invest my talents for the kingdom in the areas of influence I have, and care for those in the margins, because there will a day of reckoning when I must stand before the King who is a judge too!

But it worth waiting and persevering for, and giving up my everything for since, the Kingdom is priceless and precious a like the pearl the farmer found…

I am glad that I was invited to be part of His family and me giving him the benefit of doubt….

A mind that is being transformed….

This is my desire for this season – that I will start seeing the world the way Jesus sees, understand the Kingdom that is emerging around us, amid all the powerful maneuvering of the state and leadership…

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