A good cry

After being an “empty nest”, for more than a decade or so, recently we had a young family staying with us. With two small children. It was interesting to see how children cry. Especially the younger one. For small issues (as per adults perspective) she would break out into tears. And one good cry with a cuddling by the parents would soothe her and soon she will be back to her bubbly joyful self. And the mother had the special ability to discern if it is crocodile tears, or tearless cries or a real broken heart, but her response was generally same, a cuddle and soothing words. And that worked all times! But the elder one cried very infrequently. Because she had learnt to think through issues and decide what is significant and what is not! But the picture of a good cry soothing the soul was refreshing to see and the added picture of the mother cuddling even when tears were crocodile! 

A friend who has been going through multiple personal and larger issues told me recently, I keep awake at night, wanting to cry, knowing that a cry might release me, but tears do not come. The other end of the spectrum, where one is challenged and finds it difficult even to cry because tears have dried up! 

Traveling recently in the hills, I was taken aback by a beautiful picture. A cloud burst and rain falling into the valleys. And that cloud burst cleaning the valleys of the dirt and squalor and leaving a refreshed earth. Even nature’s cries cleanses and refreshes the earth. 

I wonder when was the last time I cried? Big boys and men are not supposed to cry. If boys cry, they are reminded, do not be like girls! Cry is a sign of weakness in our culture. And women are labelled as weak and one who easily cries for insignificant issues! Which is not true. 

But then that has been the challenge of men. The inability to cry. Bottling up brokenness inside and then that coming out as anger, frustration, addictions and making others cry through their confused responses! 

Even the Master cried. He cried over the brokenness of His city and town. He cried when His friends were crying, though He could rationalise and tell them, do not cry, I am about to raise him from the dead. But he allowed them to cry and shed tears. 

What you cry about also is important. Today mornings reading were on cries. The writer says “Pay attention to your tears, for they often lead to your destiny”. The things that move your heart can become your life destiny and direction. And even if the cries are crocodile or tearless, there is someone who hears our cries.