Haircuts

Over the past two months, I have had two haircuts—each a completely different experience.

 

The first was at one in a chain of barbershops, offered at a very reasonable price. The professionals there, and our conversation, were intriguing. Nestled in a small town in Kerala, the shop was run by three young barbers from Uttarakhand who had picked up respectable Malayalam. My grasp of Hindi allowed me to connect further, leading to minimal discussions about their lives, how they ended up here, and what it was like living far from home. Still, there was a restraint in our exchange. I pondered the reason - perhaps my age, a subtle sense of being outsiders, or that intricate web of hierarchy present in every Indian community.

 

Of course, there was an offer to dye my hair and make me look young too, which I politely refused.

 

The second haircut took place in a stand-alone shop, an older-style barbershop, again  charging the same fee but at the capital city. I had last visited  three years ago, yet the barber remembered not only me but my extended family as well. He had even cut my late father’s hair at home, so he began inquiring about each family member. He shared stories about his own family, the challenges he faced, a recent pilgrimage to 20 temples across South India, and his hopes for the future—all with little prompting from me. I wondered about the stark contrast between these experiences. Was it the existing relationship, our shared state, or the fact that we were of similar age that opened the door to such candid conversation? There was a feeling that we were part of each other's lives.

 

And he wanted to keep my hair as short as possible, and I happily consented to it! (He remembered my usual)

I left both haircuts reflecting on how “local communities” form. 

Politicians and leaders often foster divisions based on “ideologies” and “religion” - a kind of "Boiling Pot community," where open conflict is used for political ends. 

Intentionally propagated propaganda to divide and rule, promoted daily by the ‘current and breaking news of the day.’ 

And we fall for it too...

Jacques Ellul wrote in the 1930s,

“To the extent that propaganda is based on current news, it cannot permit time for thought or reflection. A man caught up in the news must remain on the surface of the event; he is carried along in the current and can at no time take a respite to judge and appreciate; he can never stop to reflect.” 

But then he says, “Propaganda ceases where simple dialogue begins.”

 

That is how communities rise above this and focus on building bridges. This does not happen overnight but is a journey. 

 

From boiling pot, the movement might be towards "Simmering Fire communities": where circumstances push people together, resulting in basic, cordial relationships—just “hi” and “bye.” But there is at times a fire on “sim.”

 

Some communities go a step further - motivated by a common goal, they become “Lukewarm communities,” marked by peaceful coexistence for the sake of a shared agenda, often related to work or an institution.

 

With proper guidance, some evolve into a "Warming community." Here, members are protective of one another because their identity is tied to the community. To some extent, people care for one another as "brothers’ keepers," understanding that safeguarding each other also preserves the community itself.

A much deeper model is shown in the good book, where a "Foot washers’ community" emerges - marked by a growing awareness of the need for mutual care, greater openness, and deeper connection. Where the Master models, literally washing the feet of a complex group of friends and followers.

 

At this moment, as we celebrate 79 years of Independence (about to reach the mature age of 80), what our nation truly needs is a transition - from boiling pots to foot washers, or at the very least, to warming communities where even outsiders feel they belong.

 

I realise it must start with me and my next haircut! Too long to wait—I should not have cut it short 