Aches, Pains and Moans

These days, I am reminded almost daily of a disease we learnt about. It has five components—“Stones, Bones, Groans, Moans, and Psychic Overtones". Of the five, three seem to be my daily companions these days: “groans, moans, and psychic overtones”, especially after travel.

 

(For those who are interested in knowing more about the disease, you can consult Dr Google—Hyperparathyroidism.) I am sure I do not have it. But I can imagine some friends already googling it, almost certain that they have it. 

 

But the question is - why is the triad of “groans, moans, and psychic overtones” increasing these days? I try to ignore it, and I succeed most days, but on some days, it keeps at it until I pay attention. It has an “ASD” - attention-seeking disorder - it wants my full attention. It took some time to realise that it was the cry of my body, screaming loudly and telling me to take things a bit slow. (There is a bit of hyperbole here, but what is a blog without that)

 

But then, this is the reality. At about 50, the body starts whispering to you, and if you are a good listener and take the necessary steps, it becomes silent again. But if you ignore the whispers, there comes a time when it starts screaming at you through aches and pains, insomnia, groans, and exhaustion - until you pay attention. In short, neither the body nor the soul can keep up with the pace. It needs more rest and solitude.

 

But then I am realising that many of my friends in their early 40s or late 30s are already complaining of at least aches and pains, and a fair bit of moaning. (Psychic or non-psychic overtones, I do not want to judge here.) Many in their 30s talk about cervical spondylosis - which we were taught happens after the mid-60s. (My age.) 

On the other hand, life expectancy is increasing. Coming back to Kerala, I come across many of my relatives in their late 90s and even a couple of centenarians. I wonder: if aches and pains and groans start in one’s 30s, how long will they have to suffer? In that sense, I am happy that it is only in my 60s that I am hearing these cries from my body. Maybe I ignored them earlier!

 

I wrote about a young relative passing away recently in my last blog. I had met her three months earlier. She had come down for her father’s funeral. She had lost her hair (post-chemo), she had to carry an oxygen concentrator alongside her, and I am sure she was in quite a bit of pain. But there was joy pouring out, hope exuding, and love overflowing. She was talking about future for their three eye hospitals.

 

Can joy coexist with aches, pains, and groans? I just finished reading an interesting book: “Joyful Anyway” by Kate Bowler. In the last chapter, she makes some interesting statements. Let me quote verbatim.

 

“Joy is a mystery: its arrival, its timing, its power, and its ability to shut down despair. I believe joy never abandons us.” 

 

She talks about a couple who lost their two sons in an accident, asking whether they would allow themselves the gift of joy. They said, “If I survived all this only to deny myself all these small joys, I would be missing out on everything that is left for me.”

 

So, the body will cry for attention; groans, moans, and even psychic overtones will hit me. But it is up to me to decide whether I choose joy or despair. The author says something more in the last chapter of her book: “Too many people die with the song still in them. You are a song - sing it” amid aches and pains.