I am a toddler

There’s a funny little pattern I’ve spotted on my blog: the more weighty or serious the topic, the fewer people seem to read it. Oddly enough, it’s the most light-hearted, downright silly posts that get all the attention. Unless it is an emotionally moving one, which I very rarely write. Perhaps the world is such a tangled mess these days that we all just crave a bit of fun escapism now and then - a chance to unwind.

 

Now, if there are any psychologists out there reading this (and if so - hello!), they’re probably thinking, “This one’s hooked on feedback.” And, well, guilty as charged! I used to be much worse, obsessively checking how many people had read my posts. It is not my fault – I blame it on my brain and social media. With apps like Facebook and Instagram, your brain gets a little dopamine reward every time someone hits “like” – and my brain is still craving! I’m still working on breaking that habit, but old routines die hard.

 

But here I am, writing serious stuff again - even though I know it might drop off a few readers. Perhaps that’s no bad thing for my attention-seeking, though!

 

Back from our recent travels - and there are a couple of images that have really stuck with me. I wrote before about visiting friends, but now I want to share a little more from that journey.

 https://santhoshsramblings.blogspot.com/2026/02/friends.html

 

At one friend’s house we stayed in, just outside town, I couldn’t help but notice the towering walls, iron gates, and barbed wire. Strangely, just a few kilometres down the road, there was another building with the same fortress-like look - a jail. We’ve got a reinforced gate at home, but not the rest. Our wall’s low enough for a dog to hop over! 

Nothing new there, but I did wonder - when did all this start? It did not start yesterday. Is it about keeping the “dangerous ones” out, or locking them in and keeping ourselves safe? It’s always “us vs them”, isn’t it? History is full of such stories. Keep them out, Keep us in…

Kids don’t really have that “us vs them” attitude - not until they hit the so-called “terrible twos” (though apparently that’s not the trendy term anymore; now it’s the " toddler tantrums phase," " developmental milestone phase," or the " assertive/independent stage "). That’s when the lines start to get drawn. Unless they are already traumatised or introverts. And let’s be honest, we grown-ups are good at keeping those lines alive – our nature, and a bit of nurture. 

 

We might look different, speak different languages, or come from different backgrounds, but really, we all start in the same way and finish up in the same place (a bit gloomy, perhaps, but true!). And we’re all made in the same image – the image of God, but all quite a bit marred.

 

But as we grow up, we grow in these “blind spots” - not the kind in your eye, but the things about ourselves we just can’t see, even though everyone else can.  The blind spot of inability to see the commonness of all – and the uncanny ability to see the differences only. So, we become “us” and “them”, and eventually just “me” and “them”. Mine is mine and yours is yours. 

 

And then, of course, there are the leaders who are experts at keeping us divided. We put so much trust and at times worship them - blindly. History is full of examples of where that’s led to destruction, but we never really learn from history.

Then leaders start telling us, “Well, what’s theirs could be ours, couldn’t it?” Because it seems sometime in the past it was ours. And before you know it, “could” becomes “should”, and we start grabbing rather than giving. Instead of working together, we end up isolating ourselves. Social media doesn’t exactly help matters either -  perpetuates these divides. Even world cup cricket is used to perpetuate this divide 

 

But life’s real magic happens in those little moments where we pour ourselves out and share with others. That’s what it’s all about, really. If we all tried a bit harder to care for each other and the planet, maybe things would look a little brighter for the next generation.

I read this somewhere - “We begin to heal the world the moment we let our walls become windows.” Or as the good book says “In God’s family there can be no division into Jew and non-Jew, slave and free, male and female” – or any other divide that we hold on to, or our leaders want us to hold on to.

 

Sometimes I do wonder if I ever really grew out of my toddler tantrums phase …